Monday, May 23, 2011

The Beginning of the End and the Start of a New Beginning.

This blog seems to only talk about PA school. Well it's really suppose to be about my general experiences in life. I, however, have very little life outside of PA school. But with the end in sight (2 rotations left) my fellow classmates/friends are making life decisions that extend past PA school.

My roommate got engaged yesterday. This isn't my first friend to get engaged. I have a pair of friends that got engaged a over a year ago. This is however my first friend that's getting engaged where I wasn't close friends with both parties. I'm also much closer to this friend than the others. I'm very happy for him. He was totally giddy on the phone when he told me. They've been dating forever, so this wasn't a surprise. However, I can't feel like this is the beginning of the end of the life I'm used to.

I follow Buddhism as a life philosophy. The focal teaching in Buddhism is that the only constant in life is change. In other words, nothing in life is forever. Change is inevitable and to fight change will be the cause of the suffering in your life.

I've been preparing myself for this event. It shouldn't be a big deal in the grand scheme of my life. I'm not the one getting married. But this will be a change to my life also. He has been one of my closest friends for the past 2 years. I do not foresee staying in touch with this friend as much as I would like for whatever number of reasons.

This isn't so much a life marker for me because of the distancing between us. It's more a life marker of friends starting to move away from each other, and to start their own life microcosm. In reality, everyone lives in their own life microcosm. They will just start to overlap less.

Buddhism doesn't tell people to ignore their emotions. If I'm melancholy about this, that's not a bad thing. It's necessary to acknowledge what is upsetting me, as to not let is fester and grow into something more and possibly debilitating. Buddhism just tries to prepare you for these events. They are going to come, but life continues. There is no reason to think this makes life worse. It shouldn't make me fearful of life without this close friendship. Live in the moment of now, not the past or hypothetical future.

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