The Power of Balls

Two stories to share today, both involving my balls.

One:
Yesterday, Boss gave me, what many thought, was an inordinate amount of shit about typing someone's allergies under Past Medical History and not recording their current medication. In my defense, Boss told me in order to "save time" just record the medications they list on the patient history form that they fill out, and the patient didn't list any medications. He specifically told me that "You know there is one important thing they don't teach you in P.A. text books. 'Don't fuck up." Okay, gezzz.

Today, we were trying to figure out what a patient had been complaining about the previous day, because we had a positive fungal culture from them and needed to give some kind of treatment. We looked at the chart and there was zero notation as to anything about a fungal culture, and it had Boss' had writing all over it. I then said to him, "Hey Boss, what's that thing they don't teach you in P.A. text books."

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH!!!! I've got a pair.

He simply laughed and said "touché."

We later found the right chart and the fungal culture was noted in full. We never told him that he didn't actually fuck up.


Two:
Boss had just left a patient, but per usual, the patient thought of another pertinent question regarding their facial hair. The patient wanted to know if it was possible that the Rogaine was effecting it even though it was there before the Rogaine treatment started. They also wanted to know if there were any good treatment plans. I told them that the Rogaine didn't seem to be affecting it and that there really wasn't any good treatment for her specific type of hair. She accepted my answers, and left.

After the patient left Boss asked me, "Guy, what exactly do the patients think your title is." I responded, "Anything they want me to be." He laughed and noted how they accept anything I say basically because I'm a man. I generally sound very confident about whatever I say even when it's, "I don't know." My female P.A. co-worker was definitely a little pissed off about that.

I also just realized that yesterday I had an EXTENSIVE conversation about a laser hair treatment. She had wanted to speak with Boss and a medical assistant said she would get him for her. Yeah, right. There was no shot he was going to see this patient that wasn't on his schedule and also not paying for an office visit.

I walked into the room and introduced myself to this patient I had never met before. I told her that Boss wasn't available but that I would be happy to answer any of her questions. We talked about whether this was a logistically practical treatment, the effectiveness of the treatment and the data to back it up. She made her decision based off my talk with her and she went on her way. In retrospect she totally thought I was something other than a medical assistant. All of the patients initially think I'm a P.A. and just because I have a pair of balls.